So, I have mentioned before that I was planning on getting baptized. It will be happening this weekend. The church has asked that I prepare a short testimony to share with the congregation the day of. Even though I have already written similar posts to this one, I felt compelled to share this one with you. In a nutshell, I am broken and He fixes. And I worship Him for that. And those two sentences are what ALL of creation is purposed for. So, here is my page in the book......
I don't have a radical, dramatic story of conversion. I am not a Paul. My story is much more subdued, but I'm sure, more common than a lot of us would like to think. Nevertheless, my story is one of grace. My story is about a broken sinner who is redeemed by Jesus Christ.
I accepted Jesus to be my savior when I was a young child, only 5 years old. At vacation bible school, I was told about the Son of God who wanted to come into my heart and be my savior. Although I was barely more than a baby, I knew deep within me on that day that God was calling for me to come to Him. That night at home, with my parents, I prayed and asked Him to come and live in my heart because I knew that I needed Him.
Although I had accepted salvation in Christ long ago, my walk of faith virtually stopped at my salvation with me going very little deeper over the next twenty years. I genuinely believed the triune God had saved me by His grace because I was a sinner who needed saving and was incapable of saving myself. Yet, despite that truth, I pursued life on my own terms. I did things my way. I considered my way, my desires, my feelings and my thoughts above all else. At times, I would superficially pursue God to see if He would give me the things I wanted on my own terms, and when He didn't, I scoffed at Him and turned back to pursue my own ways yet again. I did this back and forth game with the Lord for twenty years. I might have been 'saved', but I was very lost and so very broken. I lived my life deep into adulthood broken and in need of the redeeming power of Jesus Christ.
In the most recent months, the Lord has taught me so much about what true life with Him really looks like. He has shown me that He IS who He says He is. He has revealed to me that the reason I had such a broken life was because I was leading it, rather than letting Him be my Lord. I was doing the 'right' things, religious things, but I wasn't doing what He had really asked of me, to love Him above all else. I desired the abundant life but was not willing to give myself up in order to receive it. The Lord has taught me now, that the abundant life, the life resurrected in Him can ONLY come after the death we willingly submit to.
I am here today because after over twenty years of a hot and cold relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ, I am proclaiming to my friends, my family, the world, and most importantly, my God, that I am ready to be married to Him. I choose this death, because with it comes the resurrected life. I know these things and can say them with humble joy because of the goodness of God. He is faithful. He is merciful. He is loving and kind. And it is because He has relentlessly pursued my heart over the last two decades that I can stand before you today and say 'This is my God. This is my Jesus. Isn't He beautiful for what He has done and what He will yet do?!' Hallelujah to our great King! So, after Christ's proclamation to the world that I am priceless to Him by giving His life for mine on the cross, I am here to proclaim to the world that He is priceless to me for that very same reason.
Listen: I Exalt Thee
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