Isaiah 40:8
"The grass withers and the flowers fail, but the word of our God stands firm forever."
I have become all too familiar with God's voice, especially when it comes to him saying 'no' to me. I have my plans, I have my ideas. I bounce my important decisions off of people who can give me wise godly counsel. But regardless if all those things line up to say 'yes' to me going forward with something, God can still say no. I have learned that I don't have to know why his 'no' is 'no'. I don't have to know his reasons. Scripture tells me this about God's plans: "But they do not know the thoughts of the Lord; they do not understand his plan" (Micah 4:12) and "the plans of the Lord stand firm forever" (Psalm 33:11) So I know this: the Lord has a plan and I will likely not understand it. Oftentimes, his plans will not make sense to us. But, I also have learned that I must say yes to him when he speaks to me.
I have very recently, in a real and tangible way heard the Lord's voice to me saying 'no' in my heart. I had plans to move in with a good christian friend of mine. I had prayed for months for a roommate, had thoughtfully discussed and planned with her about our living together, and we included other christian friends in helping us come to a conclusion about our decision. All signs pointed to 'yes' from what we could see. As the day drew nearer and we began to draw up paperwork for our lease, the voice of the Lord began screaming in my heart. I got no explanation, no reasoning, no understanding for why this could not come to fruition. I just knew I was hearing God say 'no' to taking this step. Since I have learned, from rather painful experiences, that it is always best to answer in obedience to God's call, I went through the uncomfortable and uncertain steps of following him in faith. While my friend was very gracious about the obedience I had to offer the Lord in these moments, I still had much frustration for why it seemed he was making things so difficult for me in this process. But I chose to trust and obey anyway.
My first instinct in hearing 'no' is to stamp my foot and whine like a three year old. While instead, I should rejoice in his 'no' because it means two things: 1) He is protecting me from something. It might be a dangerous situation, it might be a left turn where it would be best to go right, it might just be protection from myself. And 2) Even if I don't like what he's saying, he is choosing to speak to me, to guide me, to lead me in the steps of his will. And isn't that what I've been praying and asking him to do for so long?
While scripture says that we don't have to know the plans of the Lord, sometimes, we are blessed to get a peek at what he is working. In just a matter of weeks after breaking plans with my roommate in response to the Lord's call of no, I made a sudden decision to move cities entirely. This was not something that had been on my radar even a little bit, but I something I felt a lot of peace in pursuing. On the heels of making this decision to uproot my life and move home near my family, I was able to see how God's 'no' to pursuing living with my friend was just a stepping stone into the next phase of my life he had planned for me. Had I ignored his call, I would have a big mess to clean up and get out of right now as I make my next steps in life. But because I chose to trust and obey, my next steps will be easy and largely effortless. Thank you Jesus that "If the Lord delights in a man's way, he makes his steps firm; though he stumble, he will not fall, for the Lord upholds him with his hand." (Psalm 37:23-24) Because you delight in my way [meaning my heart desires you, your glory,power and honor] you will not let me fall. I praise God for the ways even his 'no' is an act of him upholding me with his right hand and keeping me from falling and failing.
Forgive me for having such little faith that my knee-jerk reaction is to whine and pout instead of rejoicing with thanksgiving that you love me enough to guide and protect me. Thank you, Father, that your 'no' is always a protection that is keeping right in your plan-- your good, pleasing and perfect plan for me. Give me eyes to see your 'no' as faithful love to me and give me a heart that rejoices in that pruning.
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